WednesDay in Football

I'm not even going to bother with college ball today. The big news in football is that the Raiders shit-canned Lane Kiffin. This isn't news because it answers the "if" but because it finally put the "when" to rest.

As has been reported to death, the manner in which Al Davis told the media about Kiffin's firing and incompetence was bizarre, hilarious, and by most reasonable measures, excessive. Davis read aloud a three page letter that had been FedExed to Kiffin outlining the myriad ways he failed as Raiders head coach. Additionally, a transparency of the letter was shown with an overhead projector so, I guess, the assembled media could read along. Essentially, the piling on was to show that Kiffin was fired for cause and Davis would be justified in not paying him what was left on his contract.

Some of the points that were cut from the letter after the draft stage were:

• Kiffin insisted on buying his own car instead of driving the Raiders company car: a silver 1974 Cadillac El Dorado with black leather interior and a horn that plays "Guantanamera".
• Kiffin refused to call 40 yard fly patterns for all receivers on every other first down in the first and fourth quarters and every third down in the second and third quarters.
• Kiffin insisted on wearing "shortpants" during training camp.
• Kiffin refused to encourage his offensive linemen to wear brass knuckles under gloves and/or tape.
• Kiffin refused to bring Davis his daily paper (an Oakland Tribune from 1975) and breakfast (half of a bran muffin soaked in a luke warm combination of buttermilk and tap water).

So, as you can see, Davis plainly had no option but to fire Kiffin.

They both growl a lot, scare small children, and are likely to pee on the carpet.