Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Lazy Ass Football Post...

Things ain't been quite right since ol' Buddy went into retirement at Action Football! Turk and I have recently fallen into the world of gainful employment and things are busier than a beaver hooker at a Shriner's convention. Ha! Can you imagine that? I am going to laugh about that one tomorrow. Beaver hooker? Hilarious. The gainful employment is nice, but it comes at a price. We lose a bit of freedom. You have to say things like "reports" "pdf attachments" wear nice clothes, shave more than our coin purses, and when we fart we have to say "Excuse me" instead of laughing & asking for a lighter for the next one. My grandfather killed all those Germans for this? Oh, he wasn't in the war, he just hated Germans. Anyway:
  1. NFL and NCAA had a bunch of monster/illegal hits this weekend. And like the NFL always does, they only worry about it when it comes in bunches. Now, players can be looking at suspensions. Overall, hits have not been crazy mad this season. It just happened over this weekend it was bananas. At this moment, Chuck Cecil and Fred Lane stop taken veterans pay in utter disgust.
  2. Todd Dodge is out as coach of North Texas. I don't really care about this so much. This does bring up a question though. Does anybody else think about "Necessary Roughness" whenever they see North Texas play? Man, how sweet would it be to play football with the dude from "Quantum Leap"? You'd know he just took over the QB's body, because shit would be out of control. You'd all huddle up. It'd be 4 & 29 and the team was down 70 points. You'd be screaming at him to figure something out. There'd be a big as flash, he'd look up all goofy and say, "Oh boy." DAMN!
  3. BCS hosed Oregon, TCU, and Boise State. Oklahoma hasn't played anyone and they stumble up to #1. Huh? Who does this sound like? Dot the "I", Suckeyes.
  4. Farve molestered Jenn Sterger. So what? I have you seen this girl? She created a whole persona based on her showing her udders on the sideline of Florida State games. Also, it was when he was with the Jets. THE JETS! THE EFFIN JETS! That is the most sexual harassment oriented organization in all of sports. Lets look at the stats, people. First, their legendary Super Bowl winning QB tried to get to second base with Suzy Kolber on national television. Two, they had an entire section of their (READ: The Giants') stadium dedicated to trying to bother women to show their boobs. C, their locker room tried to run a train on a Univision reporter. And finally, I am willing to bet that Brian Schottenheimer, at the very least, rubbed his penis on one of Mark Sanchez's moles. I have no proof, but he looks like the kind of guy who'd do that. Also, I got a real weird gay vibe off of the both of them on "Hard Knocks". Ha! A beaver hooker? What a world.
  5. Ben Roethlisberger started this week and he is a rapist.

It ain't much, but it is something.

Monday, October 4, 2010

So Long, and Thanks for All the Beers

I've been toying with the idea since the start of training camp, but it wasn't until I got the automated email for the podcast hosting billing transaction that it hit home. I'm done with Action Football!

After two football seasons, a bunch of blog posts, 40-some-odd episodes, and about 100 on-air bottles of about 80 different kinds of beer, I'm hanging up my microphone and keyboard.

Turk, Rochester, you can get me that gold watch whenever you see fit.