Thursday, October 30, 2008

ThursDay in Football

Buddy Randolph: on the mend! I'm sitting at about 75% right now, so next week's show should be on track.

Apparently Cincinnati's getting 4 (four) quarterbacks ready for the upcoming game against South Florida. (And by upcoming, I mean to-fucking-night.) Anyway, I'm generally suspicious of running quarterback-by-committee with two quarterbacks let alone four. If there's any justice, they will run a different quarterback for each down of each series. It's so crazy, it just might work!

It's a felony to break into a dorm room? Too bad for you, Virginia fullback RaShawn Jackson. (And mind your weekends, Rochester.)

Without a game this week, Joe Paterno may have surgery. I didn't actually read this story, but I'm guessing the surgery is for his knee or hip or whatever leg injury's got him stuck in the press box. But I'd like to believe that the surgery is gender reassignment. Something about JoePa has always seemed grandmotherly to me, and I'd like to see that become a reality.

Michael Vick is going to have to plead guilty in person. Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.... The prosecutor's name is GERALD POINDEXTER! Seriously? Is Vick's attourney named Sherman Dastardly? It's like a trial from an Archie comic book.

You know things are going good in Detroit when they had to e-mail Daunte Culpepper's agent, Daunte Culpepper, to see about giving Culpepper a workout.

Economic crisis? Seemingly endless war? Fuck that shit, the Senate wants more football on tv!

"So you show up, fill out some paperwork, let the AD know when you're gonna pop, do your business, and pick up your fifty bucks."

"But isn't it weird being around, like, forty other half naked guys?"

"Yeah, the first couple times, I guess. But you get used to it. Plus craft services let's you take home food if you want."

"Uh, yeah, no thanks...."

1 comment:

Matt said...

What, no comment about Mike Singletary dropping trou just to show his team who's still got the biggest ding-dong? Easily the coolest football story of the week.