Friday, October 24, 2008

FriDay in Football

The West Virginia Coalmineers - well, Noel Devine, really - stuck it to Auburn last night. Call me crazy, but this is kind of how I'd expected West Virginia to play all year. Come to think of it, this is how I expected Auburn to play all year, too.

Tennessee is out for payback against Alabama. Apparently John Parker Wilson had a great day against the Vols last year, so I'd expect Tennessee to get revenge the only way they know how: losing by four touchdowns.

First Toledo beats Michigan, then they suspend Sean Willimason, a senior defensive lineman, for the remainder of the season; a co-captain no less. Over/under on the team rules having to do with weed? 'Cause, Christ, what else is there to do in Toledo?

Plaxico Burress was fined $45,000 by the League. For what? For being a dumbshit.

Speaking of weed and Ohio, former Buckeye got pulled over and admitted that he had marijuana in his car. In fairness, he was probably only holding it for Michael Irvin who was holding it for a friend.

Peyton Manning's second off-season knee surgery was either for or not for a staph infection. I'm pretty sure a bunch of USC players got staph infections over the summer. Then Kellen Winslow was hospitalized by one. Tom Brady's knee infection? I bet it's staph. Now, I'm no epidemiologist (well, an amateur at most) but I'm pretty sure this means that football teams are test groups for some sort new biological weapon. You know Planet Terror? This shit is going to turn out just like that.

Commish Roger Goodell is on the "shorter preseason, longer regular season train." Frankly, with an expiring CBA, the end of the salary cap, and a potential labor lock out, Goodell has bigger fish to fry. Plus he's gonna have to decide what sort of absurd suspension to hand out to Santonio Holmes.

Ummm...I got nothing.

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